February 12

”You've got to get up every morning with determination if you're going to go to bed with satisfaction.” George Lorimer

As I reflect on  my life today as opposed to a few years ago when my addiction was very active, there are a number of striking differences. Probably one of the most significant is in terms of my sense of purpose. In my acting out days, I felt lost, without purpose, and as though I was simply going through the motions. Today, I have something to live for, something to strive to achieve, goals and dreams that I want to realize. The change has happened subtly and progressively. Probably the first stage was getting to a point where waking up meant that my purpose for the day was to be in recovery. That was 2 big accomplishments in one, first wanting to work my program, but also wanting to be in the moment and live for today. Today I sense a number of different avenues of purpose. And while recovery is still important, I have found an even greater purpose, and that is to continue to seek and be willing to follow the will of my Higher Power. It is more than just abstinence from my compulsive sexual behaviours, but a desire to be a servant and to give of myself to others. My spiritual aspect that used to be buried has now come to the forefront to lead me on my journey.

Affirmation I will find the strength, courage and ability to move with purpose as I surrender myself to the will of the God of my understanding.