May 27

"God is lovingly and powerfully present with us in our laments, but sometimes that knowledge needs to be enough. Sometimes we need to learn to love God more than the happy ending we hope for."  Esther Fleece, "No More Faking Fine"

The Websters dictionary definition of lament is "to mourn aloud." I will be the first to admit that mourning is not one of my strengths, not something I am accustomed to or practiced at doing. It, like most of the strong emotions in life, is something I avoided at all costs, especially trying to live up to the image of a male in our society. On the rare occasions I have mourned, they have been done in silence. The same place that I go with my suffering. This is not a part of me that was encouraged to be done in the company of others, with their support, grace and compassion. No it was a battle to be faced alone, unseen because any public display of grief and loss meant I was weak. At least, this is the old me that I am working on changing. Books like No More Faking Fine are teaching me the power of lamenting, of crying out to God when there is pain and suffering, when I don't understand the why's of this world. It is not something I need face alone, for there is more than enough sadness in this life to go around. Sharing it makes it easier to lift the burden on my soul, one teardrop at a time.

Affirmation

God help me to be willing to cry out aloud to you today so I can express my pain, loss, and grief for I know that you are there to listen.