”The first thing, the last thing, start
from where you are.”
Dale Pendell
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I
don’t like when I find myself in a situation where I am stuck with a
particular incident running through my thoughts that it is the only thing I
concentrate on and I lose sight of everything else. It is maddening to become
so frustrated, hung up, obsessed by what someone has said or done, or
something that I have done or said that I am no longer living in the present.
Times like these make me feel like I am back in my active addiction, unable
to manage my life and simply being out of control.
It
is challenging to break the cycle, to find a way to simply stop and breathe,
reach out to my Higher Power, call someone from my support group, or change
my direction and come back to the here and now. I can lose minutes, hours or
even days “what if’ing” the event to death.
When
I finally exit this state of mind, not only do I get upset for the time I
have lost, but I have also often neglected others as well as important events
that are a part of my life. I truly need the assistance of my Higher Power to
let go of the things beyond my control as I can all too easily fall into
their clutches. I need to do a self-reboot, refocus myself in the present
moment and take a reality check. Only then can I feel secure in taking the
next step forward.
|
Affirmation
I
will try and be aware of the thoughts and feelings that preoccupy me today.
If they persist I need to find a way to let them go to stay present.
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These thoughts are part of my personal journal - reflections of where I am and have been in my recovery, but also where I want to be. My words come from my heart, and moments of clarity when I am best connected with my Higher Power. May God grant you serenity in reviewing my humble beginnings and my continuing path of recovery.
Thursday 5 July 2012
July 5
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