October 21

"The least initial deviation from the truth is multiplied later a thousandfold.” Aristotle

I think this is one of the first quotes that really hit me in the face as I began my recovery. Coming to admit that I had an addiction, to acknowledge probably for the first time the dual life I had been living was certainly difficult. I spent many weeks questioning everything about me and my past, trying to separate the lies from the truth. I know I practiced a lot of deception through my years of acting out. I think I was hard pressed to think of someone whom I hadn’t lied to along the way. It became part of my addict, seeking ways to disguise the truth to keep access to my compulsive and destructive behaviours. Through the program I have regained my capacity for honesty. Finding a group of sympathetic people where I was free, even welcome and encouraged, to share my deepest and darkest secrets and fears, has gradually allowed me to regain my faith in open and honest communication. I have shared so many things with people, complete strangers, which I thought I would never tell another soul. At a more basic level, I am truthful with myself and how I am feeling and this shows in my deeds as well.

Affirmation Honesty is truly the best policy and it’s only through the truth, through the revelation of my secrets, that I will be set free.