January 27

”Experience is not what happens to you. It is what you do with what happens to you.” Aldous Huxley

I have come to realize that my life in addiction was not about experience, not about excitement, not even about living. My compulsive sexual behaviours for the most part are boring, monotonous, and only led to the routine and stagnation. When my life revolved around sex there was little else, no variety, no true appreciation for the natural wonder and beauty of the world, no connection with the people and places I encountered. Life is recovery is completely the opposite. Because I no longer crush, hide, or avoid my emotions, living today has depth. Because I once again believe in a power greater than myself that is good, that promotes life, everything I see, hear, touch, say and do has greater meaning and purpose. No longer do I live to satisfy only my own needs and desires but instead I strive to be of service to those around me and to share my God-given talents. Life now happens with me as an active participant rather than someone out-of-focus on the sidelines. I am accepting those things outside my control and taking the reins where I can make a difference. I am working to make the best of what is thrown my way, trusting that my Higher Power is there to lead me forward.

Affirmation Good or bad, come what may, let my Higher Power guide me today. If I stand or if I fall, let His strength carry me through it all.