November 23

”Problems are to the mind what exercise is to the muscles, they toughen and make strong.” Norman Vincent Peale

If I take the follow-on step to the quote above, then I believe that prayer and meditation are the exercise of the spirit, another aspect of our being which we need to maintain and strengthen. A big part of recovery for me has been bringing those three aspects back into balance – mind, body and spirit. Each has a purpose and unique job but I am not whole without any of them. Focusing on some very basic principles was a starting point as I pulled myself out of the pit I found myself staring out from when I first admitted that I had a problem. Some of this is part of the oxygen mask principle that is part of a safety demonstration on an airplane – remember to put on your own mask before helping someone else with theirs. I need to start with the core aspects of who I am, my basic needs and ensure that they are being met, before I can venture out and start to help others. Considering my starting point from the depths of my addiction, it is not hard to see that this can take some time and effort. And some willingness and openness to be on the receiving end of a helping hand. The good thing is that most of those acts of self-care I learned at a young age and the good habits can be re-established quickly. Others that may have been lacking, or never practiced, such as prayer and meditation, may take more involvement and dedication to establish into my new life. Yet like exercise, the more I do it, the more my spiritual muscles get used to the idea, and the easier and less challenging it becomes.

Affirmation

I will flex my spiritual muscles today, and find time for prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God, even if only a tiny bit.

November 11

”Life begets life. Energy becomes energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.” Sarah Bernhardt

One of the important things I did to start taking better care of myself in recovery was to increase my physical activity and exercise. It was apparent after a short while that burning energy actually gave me more energy, and that I found I had more endurance to get through the days. It also helped that I have gotten myself into better shape, lost some weight, and rid myself of stress through sweat. There is a flip side which can be equally true. Laziness can beget laziness. I can easily get into a routine of doing nothing much at all, sitting in front of the TV or computer or whatever. Conserving energy encourages more of the same, and leads to inaction. Sitting still reminds me too much of moments of my “active” addiction, which was really an exercise in stagnation. Recovery is about participating in life again, taking an active role and working for change. It is about learning to be rich with all that my Higher Power has provided for me.

Affirmation It’s true that in giving I receive, in working my program and spreading its power with others that I gain for my own benefit.

October 12

”Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.” Sarah Bernhardt

This is certainly a truth as I have focused not only on recovery in the past year and a half, but on taking better care of myself at all levels, mind, body, and soul. Reincorporating regular exercise is an expenditure of energy that has created more energy for me on a daily basis. I am less fatigued and more motivated than before. Recovery work also breeds recovery work. There have been tools like journaling, prayer, reaching out, meditations, and affirmations that I have had to force myself to practice. Much of it was awkward and unnatural in the beginning. Yet with time and repetition, it has become something that I am more used to and, heaven forbid, even look forward to doing. I still have days when I have trouble getting started, needing to pick up a tool out of habit more than desire because I know it is good for me, and usually, somewhere in the midst of the activity I discover how good I feel and look forward to the reward of accomplishing the task at hand. It is in giving that I receive. When I feel less like doing something for myself, I can gain motivation by helping others, or simply reaching out. I need to remember to set boundaries so as not to put everyone else before myself.

Affirmation I may need to force myself to use my tools of recovery today, but creating new habits will benefit me, and those around me, in time.

June 28

”Let us move on, and step out boldly, though it be the night, and we can scarcely see the way.” Charles B. Newcomb

Cycling is one of my favorite forms of exercise. It is something I used to do a lot in my youth that I have only recently put back into my life. I remember in my younger days how I used to bike at night, on my way home from work, a friend’s place, or simply to have some time alone. On many of those night trips I used to speak to God as I pedalled, it was my time where I felt at ease to speak my mind. Recently I have restarted the practice of talking to my Higher Power while riding my bike. The combination of being close to nature, exercising and breathing fresh air, plus the memories of years ago makes me feel at home in having these conversations. There is an added comfort in reconnecting to parts of my past that were healthy and constructive. Praying while on a bike path at night where I can only see as far as my lights gives me the impression of being alone with God. At the same time, I find a strong metaphor in having to put my faith in Him to show me the way. I may be in control of the bike and what I can see, but everything in the darkness is in His hands. Yet I trust and believe that He will guide me to the right place.

Affirmation I can look for behaviours from my past that were positive but which I stopped because of my addiction. Putting them back into my life is important for my recovery.