May 6

”Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, ‘Whom shall I send and who will go for us?’ Then I said, ‘I, Here I am, send me.’” Isaiah 6:8

It’s happened more than once that I have been sitting wondering who should step up to take on a particular role and then the realization has come of, why not me? This is usually followed by a few minutes of inner dialogue while I run through reasons (read excuses) of why I am not available, capable, etc. (more excuses) to be able to take on said task (rationalization and justification.) Thankfully, I am more in tune with my instinct and have strengthened my faith in my Higher Power (spiritual awakening) to step forward and volunteer. This has been apparent in my recovery (working my program) as well as other parts of my life (wholeness). It’s important for me to listen to signs that are challenges for me (meditation) to face and overcome something I needed to work on, even though I don’t usually recognize the opportunity at first (faith in His Will). Yet it has happened enough times that I let out a sigh, look up and send a message to God (let Your will, not mine be done) know that I am listening, and jump into action. This all has a lot to do with serving, with giving of myself and with following the will of the God of my understanding. It’s a sign of growth, of trust and faith, that the path He has laid before me is a good one and that I am willing to walk it. It’s also humility in acknowledging that I may not know the best way to go and that I am ready to serve and face whatever is placed before me as there is a good reason for it.

Affirmation

Today I will work at Letting Go and Letting God, seeking His will for my life, trusting in the route He has chosen for me to follow.

May 3

”Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life's coming attractions.” Albert Einstein

I enjoy sitting down with a good book and reading a story. I’ve always been drawn to the fantasy and science fiction genres. I particular like a good adventure story, that starts with character from a very ordinary life who is thrown into an extraordinary position, and usually ends up on a quest to save the world. I like rooting for the underdog. I like using my imagination to bring the characters and the world to life, immersing myself in what my mind brings to life. I am also aware that I can use my imagination for my own benefit in the “real” world. From following suit of successful business people and athletes, I do spend time in certain aspects envisioning things that I want to happen. I use it to practice speeches and presentations in my head, visualizing success in my delivery. I use my imagination to look to the future I want to created, using a “vision” board to highlight what I want my life to be life and then working at believing that is what I have now. I do think our minds are a very powerful tool, that our thoughts are all part of the connected energy of the universe. How I think, my attitude and perceptions have a great influence in dictating what will happen to me, what kinds of experiences I will encounter, or what kind of prosperity I will receive. I am grateful that my imagination has been recovered in my recovery so that I am able to leverage it to continue bettering my life in its entirety.

Affirmation

There is a great truth in Rene Descartes idea of “I think therefore I am.” I will focus on the positive and envision good things for my future.

May 1

”Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for when you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.  And let that steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4

Suffering serves a purpose. I have witnessed this in my own recovery, and in that of others. Sometimes we need to face situations of pain and hurt in order to move forward. I have needed to be broken and stripped of my old ways in order to be ready to be rebuilt anew. It is only by shedding my old skin that I can be given a new and different one. I must be willing to let go of the shackles that bind me to the past. Change is a painful process. It is part of the cycle of grieving. I have to say goodbye to something, experience the loss, then grow to embrace the new change and accept it into my life. I need to deal with my feelings through this period of loss, rejection, anger, frustration, acceptance and contentment. It requires faith on my part that something better is awaiting me on the other side. Based on my own experience and beliefs, my Higher Power only wants what is good for me. Therefore anything that needs to be taken away will be replaced with something better. This fact doesn’t always console me or dissolve my initial reluctance to changes, but I am becoming more accepting of new and different things and trusting in my Higher Power to let go of older ones.

Affirmation

The trials I face today are part of the change process to mold me into a better person, and there are good things awaiting me at the end.