March 31

”Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” Lao-Tzu

I used to be attracted to the idea of being famous, of having enough “celebrity status” to influence people and to be able to make a difference. Yet the more I learn in my journey about being truly happy and about how I can make a real difference in the world, the more I realize that best way to go is to work on myself. It’s in mastering myself that I will become an attractive point of change. It’s a lot like the 11th tradition, that our group seeks to grow, not through promotion, but by attraction. When something is good and truly works, people will be drawn to it. There is also the aspect of service. Being well-known, being someone recognized as a leader, as the take-charge kind of person is one thing. But to be a servant, I believe, is even more powerful. The names that come to mind – Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Princess Diana – provide strong examples of the power of servitude. So allowing myself ot be a good servant, to work to help others grow and succeed is by no means a misplaced effort. I think there are professions which are like this by their very nature, nursing and teaching come immediately to mind, among others. If I think about people whom I would consider truly wise and strong, they certainly fit into the category of knowing themselves well. They are people who are not focused on others first, but in being living examples of what they believe. I am here to live my own life, no one else’s, so it makes sense that I need to have the best relationship with myself that is possible.

Affirmation

In learning about myself I will become a centre of change and make the difference I want to see in the world.

March 30

”All that a man achieves and all that he fails to achieve is the direct result of his own thoughts.” James Allen

Responsibility is a personal trait, something that can come from no one else. I’ve spent too many years believing that others can give me responsibility but this is a false idea. Responsibility is something I must take, something I have to make my own. My fears of responsibility, of not deserving to having it or to have more, are my own business. They transform into excuses of why others have not given me what I think I deserve, or feed my efforts to put myself down, to not believe in myself. Sometimes, I am not as ready for the responsibility I want as I think I am. Usually it’s more that something is holding me back. This is where getting to know myself better can help to build my confidence. Having the courage to explore what I am lacking, confronting the fears that hold me back like the possibility of more rejection or another strike at my poor self-esteem, are steps to prepare myself for the additional responsibility I am seeking. My achievements are mine. If I want them, I need to be the one to go after them. Having something simply handed to me because I think I should have it is not truly an achievement. I need to work and earn my successes. My true successes start from within, in my thoughts where I decide if I will reach my goals of if I will give up when it gets tough. That mental fortitude to go the distance, not matter the cost, is what will help me succeed. Those thoughts are no one’s responsibility but my own.

Affirmation Failure and success are part of life. My responsibility is to keep trying and continue pursuing my dreams.

March 29

”Having talent is like having blue eyes. You don't admire a man for the colour of his eyes. I admire a man for what he does with his talent.” Michael Caine

I’m firm believer in the fact that I was put here for a purpose. I have faith that my Higher Power not only created me for a reason, but that I was given the talents necessary to realize that goal as well. So therefore I have an obligation to discover what my talents are, to practice and strengthen them, and most importantly, use them so that they will be shared with the world. This page, like those before it and those I expect to follow, is part of the sharing of my talents. My writing I know is an extension of my connection to the God of my understanding. It is my own wisdom shared for others to find and take into their own lives. I know that it has been my own words staring back at me that have reminded me of a message I truly needed to hear. That kind of evidence of a Higher Power is hard to ignore. I also see that evidence of a talent shared is something that draws me to other people. I am less interested in those who have great appearances than I am towards those making an honest effort to exploit their talents for the betterment of others. These are the kinds of people I want to surround myself with, who I know will be there for me no matter what, and who have a better appreciation of what it means to truly live.

Affirmation Step 12 tells me to seek to give back to the program, and to the world, the gift of recovery so that others may also share in its success, and my talents will help to do so.