September 23

”Many people love in themselves what they hate in others.” E. F. Schumacher

It’s become apparent in recovery that often the things that bother me the most about my parents, my kids, my boss, my partner, my friends, etc. are those things that I don’t like about myself but haven’t fully admitted to having as defects of character. When I see others who are impatient, quick to judge, lacking respect or a number of other things, I am well aware of the problems of others. What I often fail to see is the mirror being presented of my own damaging behaviours. I guess part of this is human nature, of not wanting to admit that I am at fault or to blame. But often that is the case, and I just do not want to take the time to own up to my own shortcomings, to take that hard honest look at myself and admit that I was wrong. It’s so much easier to find fault in others then to find it in myself. But, and this is an important lesson for me to remember, there is nothing I can change about someone else’s problems. Mine, however, well, there is a lot that can be done to make things different. Step 6 is about being willing to let my Higher Power remove my shortcomings, to start letting go of the poor behaviours of the past that no longer serve me in a useful fashion. An interesting part of this process is that it gives me the freedom to start seeing the good things in others that I like about myself, instead of only focusing on those aspects I don’t like. This is a positive change of view and just another sign of my personal growth in my journey of recovery.

Affirmation

I will look to see what bothers me about others today and reflect on my own issue with that behaviour or character flaw. Perhaps there is more for me to learn and change.