November 21

”The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives.” Albert Schweitzer

Working the steps has made me realize how much of my time in my addiction was spent stagnating. Maybe not to the point where I was spending my days as things inside me were dying, but there were certainly many aspects of my being that were not being nourished and allowed to grow. A big part of my work in recovery has been to revive those parts of me which have lain dormant for months and years, to help them flourish and thrive as they are a vital part of who I am. Obviously one of the most significant aspects was my spiritual self. This is one which definitely had to take a back seat in order for my addiction to maintain power and control in my life. This is also why the steps have been such a boon as they have guided me back to a healthy spirituality. The human spirit is nothing if not resilient. I am learning that nothing within me ever really dies; it can be rekindled and nurtured back to life. My addict tried relentlessly to keep the good and moral parts that were at odds with it hidden in the shadows. It’s part of my job to bring them back to the forefront where they belong. This is part of my process of surrendering and living life on life’s terms.

Affirmation

I will focus on working the steps today to bring back those parts of me which my addict wanted left under lock and key. These are the things that will help me grow and thrive as I work my program.