December 29

” Wherever you go, go with all your heart.” Confucius

The holiday season can be a particularly difficult one. It has indeed been hard for me over the past several years, for different reasons. Well, maybe not that different, many of my recent Christmas’ have been challenging because my family has had significant changes – some of those losses because of my separation and divorce, others because of gains as I also remarried and created a blended family. Each season of change brings with it unique aspects to adjust to and incorporate into the “new normal.” Through all of this, going with all my heart has been an underlying goal, but certainly something more difficult as I have dealt with losses. It is not always easy or obvious how to focus on all the blessings and good things that remain in my life when something important has been lost. Put another way, it’s hard to lead fully with my heart when I am feeling heart-broken. Maybe, in retrospect, I was there in those moments with my all my heart, at least those parts which were still intact. Perhaps this is another area where I need to be gentle with myself and accept that my capacity for love, affection and full commitment to being present is something that fluctuates given the circumstances I find myself in. My 100% doesn’t always translate the same way, and that is okay.

Affirmation

It is okay for my all to not been the same from day to day or season to season. I will focus on being present to the best of my ability, just for today.