”Fate leads the
willing, and drags along the reluctant.”
Lucius Annaeus
Seneca
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I firmly believe that addiction, and I
include all types in my definition, is a disease of choice. That my
uncontrollable and unmanageable craving is caused by an illness that affects
my ability to make rational decisions, and which circumvents my capacity to
recognize the consequences of my actions. Having come to this belief has also
increased my fear of being able to make good choices in my recovery.
The problem is that life is full of
choices. In fact, it’s probably what we spend most of our time doing, from
the very simple tasks of taking care of ourselves, our surroundings, or doing
our job, to the larger choices of setting goals, working towards dreams, etc.
So I suppose it should come as no surprise that there are times when I shy away
from making choices.
As Patrick Carnes points out in his
Recovery Zone series, decisions come at the cost of some sort of loss,
something is cut away as the origin of the word suggests. Deciding to eat
healthier means giving up some of my comfort foods. Deciding to exercise
means giving up some time lazing around doing nothing. Deciding to be in
recovery means having the willingness to cut out my addict. All these
decisions come at a cost. The problem is, the decisions have to be made, the
price paid, in order for me to move on. And this can be why it seems hard to
make choices, especially the right ones.
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Affirmation
Decisions
are a part of my life. While the cost of a choice might seem steep right now,
chances are the long term effects will more than offset the price I will pay.
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These thoughts are part of my personal journal - reflections of where I am and have been in my recovery, but also where I want to be. My words come from my heart, and moments of clarity when I am best connected with my Higher Power. May God grant you serenity in reviewing my humble beginnings and my continuing path of recovery.
Book Sales
My first print run of 100 copies sold out, but I have had a second printing of an additional 250 copies done this year. So more are available, now at a cost of $20 CAD. My second book, Twelve Steps for Everyday Living, is now available for purchase for $15 CAD. It is my attempt, based on my experience and those who've been a part of my recovery journey, to transform the 12 Steps into a tool for anyone to use to navigate the challenges and trials of life.
In Serenity,
Scott Email: sastewart74@gmail.com
Review it? Do you have a copy and enjoy what you have read? Can you help me promote it by leaving a good review at Goodreads (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21939460-lean-on-me)? Thanks for your support.
In other news, after a long debate and some peer pressure, I have started a second blog, along the same vein as Lean on Me, but in my second language. You can check it out here - Tomber dans l'appui.
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