October 25 (100)

”Purity of soul cannot be lost without consent.” St. Augustine

It was a hard fact to face in a treatment session that I had given my power away. Learning about the destructive power of resentment, I began to see how blaming others, holding grudges, and seeking revenge were all acts that kept me tied to the past and allowed others to continue to influence my life years after the fact. Worst of all, I had done this to myself, allowed a part of me to take a stranglehold of my emotions, to deny a very core part of my being in order to further my harmful and compulsive behaviours. The core of who I am still remained beneath all the garbage, lies, cheating and other negative stuff I piled on top of it over the years. I had neglected my emotional and spiritual selves, yet could not destroy them, only hid them out of sight, out of mind. As I had chosen to bury those parts of me, I also regained the ability to dig them out and reintegrate them into my whole being through working my program. The human spirit is nothing if not resilient.  I have heard stories from people that have amazed me in seeing how far they have fallen only to rise back into a healthy state of living. The program is nothing short of a miracle for providing a framework to allow us to rediscover ourselves and return to society as a whole person.

Affirmation I have not lost who I am or who I was meant to be. I simply need to continue to work at rediscovering myself.