August 23

”Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.” Maggie Kuhn

It’s been quite apparent in my life since finding SAA that there is no going back. I know too much now, about addiction, about the program and about myself to give in blindly to my compulsive behaviour. Like the cartoon characters of old, I’ve looked down after walking off the cliff into mid-air and realized that gravity exists – and that I will fall. This awareness has also put me in touch with my feelings. I find myself no longer content to avoid them, push them away, ignore them or use them to act in an inappropriate manner. I feel more compelled to speak my mind, to share how I react, how I feel, and how I am in situations that impact my life. I do not do this for the benefit of others but to keep control in my life and let out what I would normally have put under lock and key. It is not always an easy task to reveal my emotions, to continue to be open, honest, and willing. Yet I know the path my life takes when I do not, and that person is no longer someone that I desire to be. I owe it to myself to live a better life.

Affirmation I will continue to share my feelings, not to guilt or belittle others, but to free myself of my emotion and guard my serenity.