April 24

”You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victim without having victims.” Harriet Woods

My recovery is just that – mine. The fact that I am reaching out for help, that I am seeking new tools and ways of coping with life – all these things change only one person, me. It does not mend broken relationships or fix other people. It does not put a flashing neon sign above my head that will tell people that I am in recovery and getting better. So my recovery is really focused on that phrase from the Serenity Prayer “the courage to change the things I can.” There are days that I think my relationships, especially those with my partner and family, should be improving as rapidly as I change myself. But I need to step back and remember that it takes 2 people to maintain a relationship. If my foundation is improving, but the other person has not been making changes, then the connection between us will not change a great deal. I need to keep a realistic view of what is occurring in my relationships. All those parts of my life that are external are more likely to change on someone else’s schedule, and not according to my wants and desires. I need to be patient and content with my own progress. Everything else will come in due time.

Affirmation I need to be aware and maintain reasonable goals for the changes in my life. It’s important to remind myself that the primary purpose for my recovery is self-improvement.