February 18

”Nothing is more wretched than a guilty conscience.” Plautus

Many of us did not experience guilt or shame during the periods of our lives where we actively acted out. It is often not until we have gained some sobriety that we can look back and experience the negative emotions that accompany our behaviour, not only for the harm we have caused ourselves, but those around us as well. There are others of us who have experienced guilt and shame throughout our addiction and the best way we knew to deal with it was to avoid it by turning back to our false higher power, our addiction. This led us to a vicious cycle of acting out, feeling guilt and shame, evading things and feelings by acting out, and so on. Our guilt and shame, once recognized for what they are, do eat away inside us. In the SAA program, we learn that sharing our past, sharing our experience and our sexual patterns, has the power to free us from the guilt and shame that we carry within ourselves. Lifting this burden from our shoulders gives us new life, hope and strength to put towards our recovery.

Affirmation Today I will not succumb to my guilt and shame. I can share it with my Higher Power, sponsor or group and let it go.