July 10

”If you take care of the small things, the big things take care of themselves.” Emily Dickinson

It is still scary how the little things can throw off my life and impact my serenity. One of the things that has always, and continues to bother me is a lack of communication. It still shocks me how quickly not getting the information or regular contact I need can easily lead me to the conceive the worst, most disastrous situations which are all too often unfounded and just a result of my imagination run wild. I dislike how rapidly being in the dark, and I mean less than a 24-hour period, I can bring myself to the edge of despair and hopelessness. The other major drawback is that falling into this mental black hole also opens the door to my addictive thinking. My dark mood can all too readily spiral my thought patterns back to middle and inner circle planning and fantasizing. It is challenging trying to turn over the unknown to my Higher Power. When I feel desperate for knowledge I still struggle to accept that many of these things will not resolve themselves according to my schedule. I need support and friendly reminders about staying focused in the present to maintain my serenity and sobriety. My program requires me to seek moderation and compulsively obsessing about anything will not lead me in the right direction.

Affirmation I need to be aware of places in my life where I obsess. This can be turned over to the God of my understanding to help guard my sanity.