July 12

”The important thing is this: to be ready at any moment to sacrifice what you are for what you could become.” Charles Dickens

I often question which choices are fulfilling the will of my Higher Power voice those that are of my own design. I think my place where this is least clear is in dealing with my spouse. Having made many efforts to reconcile, reading scripture and working through self-help books to improve my knowledge of the role I should be taking thus far have had little impact as my partner has barely begun their own journey of recovery. It is easy for me to doubt what the future holds and trust that my Higher Power knows what is best for me in the long term. I know the hard choice, loving when no love is returned, forgiving when no pardoning comes back, hoping when all seems hopeless, is the way I should be going yet as a human being I have limits. It is hard not to give in to frustration and despair. In times like these I need to turn back to my program, my outer circle, and do what I can to take care of me. If I concentrate on life a day at a time I let go of worrying about what the future holds and keep myself more open to the will of the God of my understanding.

Affirmation My sacrifice for today will be to follow the path that is difficult, but likely the best one for me in the long run.