November 16 (78)

”Because no retreat from the world can mask what is in your face.” Gregory Maguire

I do remember periods of my youth where I was teased about wearing my heart on my sleeve, where I was too sensitive. Maybe those remarks conflicted with how I saw I was supposed to be as I matured – less emotional, with a tougher skin. Yet I know that I kept some of my emotional displays throughout my life, for example I have always cried at the sad and touching parts of movies, even when at the theatre. There are other places where I should have taken notice to understand how poorly I hide my emotions. I have never been the best card player; I certainly have little aptitude for a “poker face.” So as much as  I thought I was  good at hiding my double life, I only really succeeded as well as I did by all the extra effort I put into my “good” persona while at the same time keeping everyone at arm’s length. The isolation prevented anyone from getting to know me too well. Since finding the program I have found a place where I do not have to hide my feelings. I can be myself, feel at ease being honest and open about how things are really going in my life. It is a freedom I never expected to find, being able to take off my mask and just be. This is a gift from my Higher Power and the program which I cherish.

Affirmation My emotions are an important part of who I am and I will learn to accept them and appreciate the richness they add in my life.